Sunday Family Dinner
by Susan Dewitt, CSJP
A Culture of Love and Connection
A few weeks ago I sat down at a table with speakers of American Sign Language, Salvadoran Sign Language, Spanish and English, with children, parents, seniors, all of us helping the conversation bounce around the table while we ate delicious food from many kitchens, laughed, and enjoyed being part of the community at Sunday Family Dinner.
On most Sundays of the year Sunday Family Dinner happens at Karl Edwards’ and Lisa Dennison’s house in northwest Seattle. The invitation goes out by email on Friday or Saturday like this one from October, 2017:
We are noticing the chillier weather and will offer baked potatoes and salad! Might bake some brownies or cookies too! Hope to see you all tomorrow to celebrate this change in seasons.
The invitation goes out to 47 households; the list includes former Jesuit Volunteers, people from Seattle’s St. Patrick Parish, neighbors and international visitors – one couple from France has returned to start their own Dîner de famille du dimanche. Fortunately Karl and Lisa have a big kitchen and spacious dining and living room, plus an impressive collection of chairs and tables and china and cutlery. Somehow everyone always fits in, somewhere between 20 and 40 people on any given Sunday. Everyone brings a favorite dish or a dessert or a bottle of wine and that all fits together too, into an ample and surprising feast.
For those who come to Sunday Family Dinner it’s “Eucharist, without the bells and whistles,” “the community everyone should have,” “a culture of love and connection.”
Sunday Family Dinner has been meeting for over four years now; it was Lisa and Karl’s daughters, Sarah and Theresa Edwards, who got it started. When Lisa asked them who she should invite to a Sunday family dinner, they said “Everyone!” A tradition was born!
Dinner begins in the kitchen, as everyone holds hands and forms a circle for very quick introductions and grace (usually spoken by Lisa), plates are filled, and smaller communities of conversation form at each of the long tables. While there are often new faces and friends, most of those at Sunday Family Dinner on any given night are regulars who are renewing and continuing conversations in depth about life, faith, politics, gardens, sources of hope. Part of the company, always, are the family cats and dog, and sometimes we’re invited to meet the latest litter of shelter kittens that Lisa and Karl foster until they are adopted.
As you would hope in a family, there are celebrations – birthdays, moves, college acceptances, new jobs – and the group has put together care packages for kids in college and gathered and packed toiletries for Syrian refugee families. But most of all, we’re there for dinner, a dinner we’ve all contributed to, and for family conversation. This gathering that happens because of and in spite of the isolation that can be such a difficult part of city life brings us all hope and strength for each week to come.
Voices from around the Table
Sunday Family Dinner is Eucharist without the bells and whistles. It has meant the world to Arthur, Aurora and me in our respective transitions to life in Seattle. God bless. (Andrea Hoekstra)
I love SFD, gathering with friends, family, feeling of belonging, celebration, supporting each other, the community everyone should have. (Chris Covert-Bowlds)
I have no family in Seattle and minimal elsewhere, so at SFD I get to deepen connections with my Seattle chosen family. ...we have an awesome amount of expertise, so I’m always learning something or networking, and I’m certainly laughing a lot. I love spending time with people from other generations as well as my own. And yes, in our country’s climate of hate and pandemic loneliness, gatherings like SFD are a “yes” to a culture of love and connection. (Kathy Wilmering)
Sunday Family Dinner is a blend of old fashioned, warm, down to earth, “come as you are,” community pot luck, of old and new friends who gather weekly to break open our lives as we literally break bread together. Lisa and Karl open their home and hearts each Sunday evening with a generosity that is as spacious as their cozy, warm, family home. Upon arriving folks can be seen all over their living room, dining room, and kitchen working puzzles, playing games, reading on the couch, visiting, playing with the foster kitties in the front office, giving and receiving warm hugs of welcome, as stories are shared of the past week’s joys and challenges. Lisa invites us to gather together before the meal to introduce ourselves for anyone new to Sunday Family Dinner.
Especially wonderful is Lisa’s invitation to pray for intentions and in thanksgiving during our hand-holding, pre-dinner grace. It reminds me of dinners back home. Birthdays are celebrated with desert and singing. We’ve had over 35 people some weeks and there always seems to be enough to feed everyone. This Sunday dinner is one of the special gifts in my week, and I thank God for Lisa, Karl, and this amazing Sunday Family Dinner Community! (Kathleen Tyrrell)
Sunday Family Dinner is a beautiful example of making a village. It is local—we all know it is centered at Karl and Lisa’s house. It draws people from nearby (i.e., not virtual), so we are a geographic community. It is reliable—we can count on SFD to happen on Sundays when we might want to get out of our houses and meet with others whom we have known for decades, or some we will meet for the first time. It is welcoming—no one is turned away. People come who are all ages, from babies to elders. People come who’s first language is not English, fresh from other countries. People come who are deaf or disabled. People come who have been in this same community for decades. Also, it is delicious. People come offering their gifts of food, and everyone goes away satisfied. For those of us whose families may be far away, Sunday Family Dinner feels like an extended family gathering with joy, laughter, and sharing.
A year and a half ago, our daughter suffered a serious infection, was hospitalized for 10 days, and then needed a strict regimen of IV infusions while recovering at home. People from Sunday Family Dinner supported us through the entire ordeal. We know they are there for us, as we are for them. God bless Karl and Lisa for this extraordinary gift. (Jan Thomas)
This article was published in the Spring 2018 issue of Living Peace.